Where has all the good Wi-Fi gone and where are all the mbps?
If I spend another half an hour uploading a two minute video I will cry.
I think I injured my hand when I hit the wall the other day
Because I couldn’t get on the Zoom call.
My mental health is hanging on by three slim threads
And slow Wi-Fi is the hammer blow to sever all ties.
See, the smoking and the running counteract each other but
Both save me from the glacier speeds of the local internet.
Pictures of naked women revealing themselves one pixel at a time in 2006
Loaded faster than some of the files I try to open now.
Bebo top 16s and featured videos hit lightning speed
Compared to the blank profiles of my friends and followers.
All the Councillor’s preach about Fibre broadband
But it is in none of our homes.
I have a big assignment coming up so I bought a pack of cigarettes and a Garmin watch
To prepare for my panic attack filled uploading spree.